It's a girl!

For those who haven't been told, and for those who can't take a hint from the blog's new colors (not to mention this post's title), Rebecca and I are excited to share with you that we are having a little baby girl! We are both pumped as all get-out and can't wait to experience life with her! I hope to put a sonogram video on YouTube soon. I'll keep you posted!

A Confident Heart

Rebecca and I recently went in for the ten week checkup. I'm always excited about these appointments; the opportunity to see the baby through the sonogram makes the pregnancy more tangible for me. Obviously the pregnancy is already real for Rebecca, the constant nausea won't allow her to feel otherwise, but, even though I'm consciously aware of the pregnancy, it just doesn't feel like a reality to me yet. So, needless to say, I was excited about seeing the baby.

After we made it into the doctor's office, a nurse directed us to a new room and then began to try and find the child's heartbeat. This was new to us; where was the sonogram machine? Were we not going to get to see the Baby? As it turns out, the appointment was only scheduled to verify the child had a strong heartbeat and a sonogram was not needed in order to do so.

As the nurse was trying to find the heartbeat, I began to get worried. I remember thinking, "What if they can't find the heartbeat?" Two minutes went by and she still hadn't found the heartbeat. Again I began an internal infinite loop of anxious thoughts, "Why would it take this long to find the heartbeat? Is this normal?" When I couldn't take it anymore, I spoke up and asked the nurse if this was normal. She reassured us that she was sure everything was alright and that sometimes it took up to three people to come in and find the heartbeat. And, as if she had just finished foreshadowing what was to come, she left the room to find another nurse to try their hand at searching for the heartbeat.

Right as the nurse left the room, I shot a confident look at Rebecca to let her know it was going to be alright and she shot the same look back. I could tell both of us were doing our best to not seem alarmed. A few moments passed and the other nurse came in and began the search. Time seemed to stand still.

Then it happened, a strong and confident heartbeat could be heard through the speakers. Rebecca and I looked at each other in amazement! What a miracle! Life! The baby within Rebecca, though small and helpless, had a strong heartbeat! What an amazing reality!

All of a sudden, it didn't matter that I couldn't see the baby; I knew it was doing well... I could hear it! I can't wait until the next appointment when I'll be able to hear it again!

"My heart is confident in you, O God; my heart is confident. No wonder I can sing your praises!" - Psalm 57:3 NLT

Nine Weeks

It seems like it was just yesterday when Rebecca told me we were pregnant. Wonder, excitement, joy, confusion, uncertainty and fear came over me. As I was thinking, "How am I going to pay for this?", my mouth moved and "That's great baby! I'm so excited!" came out. I was at that time, and am now, genuinely overjoyed about being a father, but this wasn't some small event; this news pointed to a future that was much different and uncertain than the reality we had grown accustom to!

So many questions went through my mind that night: "How do we know if the baby is ok?", "What happens if...", "What should we do about...?", and "What's the best way to pay for ...?" When I think about it for too long, I end up thinking about how many things there are that can go wrong instead of thinking about what God has already provided!

Why do we allow ourselves to focus on what can go wrong when we know God and His plan can't go wrong?

It's funny how we allow anxiety to become a part of our lives. There is always something to worry about; even after the baby is born, the next phase in our lives will contain uncertainties. Worrying about the health of the baby in the womb will be followed by worrying about the health of the baby as it grows outside the womb. Each step of the way there will be something else to worry about; if we let it, an infinite loop of fear and uncertainty can consume us.

It's been nine weeks and, even though I still have questions, fears and uncertainty, the baby is doing well. God has continued to provide in ways that only He can and Rebecca and I feel extremely blessed. There are still plenty of things to worry about at this time in our lives, but we've resolved to let God worry about them instead. Pray for us and the baby as we continue to refine our reliance on the Lord.

Morning sickness

This entire pregnancy, Rebecca has had morning sickness, mid-day sickness and night sickness. She's been in an infinite loop of nausea and I'm sure she feels like she'll be stuck in it forever. I can think of very little that is worse than feeling constantly sick.

About 6 months ago, I was diagnosed with multiple ulcers. This was why I would consistantly feel like I had just done 5,000 situps, become light-headed and then get sick. After about 8 weeks of medicine, the ulcers healed and they've given me very little trouble since. It is because of this experience that I can have the sympathy that I do for Rebecca. I know how draining it is to feel sick to your stomach all day, how distracting it can be and the frustration that it brings. Unfortunately for Rebecca, even if the Lord is willing for this to last only through the first trimester, she still has a couple of weeks left.

Please keep Rebecca in your prayers; pray that the Lord would allow the next couple of weeks to pass by quickly and for her stomach to begin to feel better. And don't forget about me! Please pray for me as I find ways to comfort and support her. We love you all and thank you for your support!

The Baby Brooks

Rebecca and I are so excited about the coming addition to our family! We hope to post periodic updates about the baby, things we're learning and what God is doing in our lives during this time!

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